so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
