why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
