just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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