k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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