dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
