DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
