it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
