no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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