he puts the penis in happiness.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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