Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
