I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize