tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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