So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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