whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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