I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
My ass is underappreciated
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
