I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
