I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
