Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
