as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
