There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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