Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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