she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
