what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
