you would pick up someone in the library
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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