i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
