Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
