Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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