I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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