It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
