I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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