Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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