you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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