New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
sex in a hospital.. check
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
