The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
