i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
