Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
