scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
It's shark week go big or go home
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
