I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
