Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
