East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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