Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize