im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
