idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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