I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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