Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
