Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
