You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
