UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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