I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
love makes seman taste better
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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