i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
